Shit. Gerard thought as Frank closed the door to their hotel room. He honestly hadn’t been this nervous in years. Maybe not since that first show he played sober. His heart was pounding, his palms were sweaty, and he was pretty sure that his body was starting to vibrate. What if he messed this up?
“So… are you ready?” Frank asked kindly, walking up to Gerard and hooking his index fingers through his belt loops. “You look a little terrified.”
“I… I-I’m just kind of unsure still. I’m sorry.” Gerard croaked, scratching the back of his neck and looking awkwardly to the side, really trying to keep his eyes on anything but his boyfriend. “Are you sure Mikey and Ray won’t hear us? They’re just next door.”
“It’s fine. They went out drinking earlier, they’re out.” Frank murmured, moving his hands back a little until they joined at the small of Gerard’s back and he was holding him by the waist. “Look, it’s just me. We don’t have to do anything that you don’t want to, but tonight’s our best chance. We’ll be sleeping on the bus the next week.”
“Y-Yeah umm… I want to. I don’t know why I’m so anxious about this.” Gerard blushed, still staring down at his shoes. “I um… I just don’t want to be bad at it. I know it’s really stupid, but I really don’t want you to stop liking me you know? I don’t even know what would happen to the band if you felt that way.”
“Gee, we’ve been over this.” Frank chuckled, planting a kiss on Gerard’s forehead. “I’ve liked you since we first met at that stupid party. We’ve had sex like a thousand times before, don’t think of this as any different.”
“I guess…” Gerard glanced over towards the bed and fidgeted a little. “Does it hurt?”
“Only if the other person’s being too rough.”
“And you’ll be gentle?”
“Of course I will.” Frank whispered, tilting Gerard’s chin up and giving him a quick kiss on the lips that made both their hearts jump.
“Can you start?” Gerard whispered back against Frank’s mouth.
“Sure. Just remember it’s like any other time.”
Frank took Gerard by the wrist and Gerard let him lead him, calming down a little bit as he laid down on the bed and Frank snuggled in beside him, hooking one leg over Gerard’s and one arm over his chest with their lips just inches away from each other’s.
For a few seconds, Gerard locked eyes with Frank and he could feel his heart rate slowing down. Frank just looked so… comforting. It really was just like all those other times, only this time they’d be going a step further. At least for Gerard it was further. “I…”
“Shh.” Frank hushed, slowly leaning in to close the gap between them. “Just kiss me like you always do.”
Gerard closed the final space keeping them apart and did exactly what Frank told him, melding his lips against the other man’s with just the smallest amount of tongue that let him taste Frank, but didn’t make it too dirty. “Mmph.” He mumbled against him, his hand flying up to cup Frank’s cheek as they kissed. Frank tasted like the coffee they’d had just an hour ago and it made Gerard want to use his tongue more. This was always his favorite part. Before they got undressed, they would lay together and just kiss, getting each other nice and warm before the sex started. “Frankie.” He breathed against him. “Fuck, I really love you. You know that right?”
“I know that, Baby.” Frank promised, turning his head to start kissing Gerard’s neck.
“God I love when you do that.” Gerard purred. It was like Frank’s lips were electric. Every kiss he planted on his neck and collar left him feeling tingly and when he started leaving hickies, Gerard started to feel twinges in his boxers. Frank swirled his tongue and the blood rushed to Gerard’s cheeks. “Baby I think you can start taking your clothes off now.”
“Ooh, moving a little faster today.” Frank laughed before pressing a kiss to Gerard’s chin. “Arms up.”
Gerard did what he was told and let Frank pull off the black t-shirt he’d been wearing for two days, shaking out his bright red hair once it was off.
“There we go.” Frank murmured, dropping down to take Gerard’s nipple in his mouth, sucking and nibbling on it just to get a couple gasps out of Gerard.
“Fuck.” Gerard bit down hard on his lower lip.
“I fucking love what that does to you.” Frank snickered, running one tattooed hand down Gerard’s pale side. “Your skin gets all hot too.”
Gerard laughed a little and looked away, still blushing fiercely as Frank began to press a trail of kisses to his body, leading down from his collar, over his stomach, and to the hairs of his navel that led straight to his belt buckle.
“You and your fucking bat belt, I swear to God. I’m gonna cut my dick on this thing one day.”
“You like when I’m nerdy.”
“That I do.” Frank said, wiggling his eyebrows before pressing a kiss to the bulge in Gerard’s jeans. “Can I take these off?”
“Gotcha.” Frank undid his belt then quickly thumbed open his jeans, earning a sigh of relief from Gerard once he dragged down the zipper. “Damn, it’s easy to make you hard.”
“Is that bad?”
“No. It’s cute.”
“Okay.” Gerard sighed, lifting his hips so Frank could pull his jeans down along with his boxers. “Can… Can I take your clothes off?” He asked shyly, pushing himself up a bit and tucking his hair back behind his ear so he could see Frank better. He felt really exposed and kind of vulnerable, but he wasn’t too freaked out. Frank had seen him naked plenty of times before and he was horny enough not to think too hard.
“Yeah, here.” Frank nodded, moving back up to give Gerard a kiss before climbing off the bed and standing in front of him. “Just do whatever you want to me.”
“Okay…” Gerard swallowed as he sat on the edge of the bed, parting his knees so Frank could stand between his legs. “I really love your tattoos.” He murmured, dragging down Frank’s zipper and cupping the bulge, squeezing it just a little bit to help him get harder. “I know we’re about to fuck, but I’m pretty tempted to suck your cock right now.” Gerard whispered as he pulled down Frank’s jeans and briefs, standing up in front of him and putting his arms around his waist once they were down, one hand reaching slightly down just to feel the curve of his ass. “Frank?”
“Do you know why you’re the only guy I’ve ever been with more than a month?” He asked softly, leaning in to kiss the corner of Frank’s mouth.
“Because you’re the only one who’s ever been patient with me.” Gerard murmured, lifting up the fabric of Frank’s t-shirt. “And no one else ever made me feel safe enough to open up like I do with you. And no one was ever as talented, smart, or funny as you are.” Frank lifted his arms and Gerard took the shirt off, pulling him close and kissing him again, softly and with love. “So, I think… that I’m doing the right thing with you.”
“You’re such a softie.” Frank teased, pushing his fingers into Gerard’s hair and pulling him into another kiss that smushed their noses together and almost made Gerard fall back onto the bed. “You know that you’re the only guy that’s ever fucked me?”
“Yeah.” Frank grinned, nuzzling his nose against Gerard’s cheek. “I mean, I was with a lot of other people, mostly guys, but you were the first for me too. So don’t feel scared okay?”
“I can’t believe you never told me that.” Gerard giggled. “It really wasn’t that big of a deal for you?”
“Not really. I mean it meant a lot because we were intimate, you know?” Frank shrugged. “But I wasn’t too scared to let you do that. I mean I uh, kind of knew how it felt like already because teenage me was a little fucker about masturbating, but I’ve always trusted you and stuff. It wasn’t a problem.”
“So it really doesn’t hurt?”
“It doesn’t hurt.”
Gerard bit his lip and looked towards where they’d dropped their suitcases. “Okay, go get the lube and condoms and everything.”
“Awesome.” Frank kissed him one more time, on the chin, then walked over to get everything they needed while Gerard got settled back on the bed. He wasn’t entirely sure of what position he wanted yet. Doggy style looked easy, but he wanted to be closer to Frank then that. Maybe if they just put a pillow under his hips, they could have sex face to face.
“Hey Frank can you lie on top of me for this? I want to be able to kiss you.”
“Sure Baby, hold on.”
“Okay.” Gerard was getting a little bit jittery, but fuck he was really turned on. Frank bending over the suitcase really wasn’t helping. He slipped his hand down and started slowly dragging it up the length of his cock, spreading the pre-cum around. “Fraannnkkk come onnn.” He whined, sticking out his lower lip as Frank turned around.
“Christ, don’t make me feel like a pedophile.” Frank chuckled, running over to the bed and lying down beside him. He tossed the condoms and lube on the blankets beside them and pulled Gerard back into a kiss, swirling his tongue as he reached down and batted Gerard’s hand away. “Here, let me touch you a little.” He murmured as he slowly rubbed Gerard’s cock. “It’ll feel better if you’re really turned on.”
“Damn, I’m already there.” Gerard mewed, sticking his head in the crook of Frank’s neck. “Can you start prepping me? I want to get that part over with.”
“Sure Baby.” Frank kissed his neck. “Let me get the condom on now before my fingers are all y’know, slippery and stuff.”
“Mmk. Hurry.” Gerard watched him as he tore open the wrapper and rolled the condom on, his fingers digging into the sheets with anticipation. He sort of felt like a virgin again. This was one of the very few things he had never done and now he was trusting Frank with it. It was hot, but it also made him kind of emotional. This was an important step…
“Okay, here open your legs.”
Gerard did what he was told and kept watching as Frank slicked up his fingers. “Slowly?”
“As slow as you need, Gerard.” He promised, waiting until Gerard parted his thighs before lying down next to him and slipping his hand between them. “Ready?” Frank asked carefully, placing the tip of his index finger at Gerard’s entrance.
Gerard gave a shaky nod.
“Take a deep breath, okay? It’ll hurt if you’re all tensed up.” Frank kissed him again and nuzzled their noses together. “It’s just me, Baby. You can relax.”
“Okay.” Gerard breathed, closing his eyes and relaxing his muscles. “Sorry.”
“Don’t be sorry. You ready for me to put it in?”
“Yeah.” Gerard smiled, blushing sheepishly at him and sharing yet another kiss before Frank started to slowly, gently, push his index finger inside. “Ah!” Gerard winced as it was pushed all the way in. “It burns.”
“It’s okay, it’s okay.” Frank cooed. “You just have to give it a second. I’ll keep still.”
“O-Okay.” Gerard stuttered as Frank petted his hair and kissed his forehead, keeping the finger that was inside him absolutely still.
“Remember to stay relaxed. Deep breaths.” Frank cooed to him, putting an arm around his shoulders. “It’ll stop soon. Your body will adjust. I promise.”
“Did it feel that way for you?”
“It did when I did it to myself.” Frank shrugged. “It’s normal, don’t be scared.”
Gerard’s took in a deep breath and squeezed his eyes shut, feeling the burn slowly start to fade. “Okay I think it’s starting to feel better?”
“Yeah? Tell me how this feels.” Frank said as he started to slowly ease his finger in and out.
“…It feels kind of good now.”
“Yeah…” Gerard turned his head to look into Frank’s eyes and felt his lips pulling up in a grin. “I like it.”
“You’re fucking cute.” Frank chuckled as he slowly pushed another finger inside, gently twisting them around to loosen him up. “Just tell me if it hurts.”
He hissed a little when it was all the way in, but he adjusted a lot faster this time and started to feel good again. “Ohh fuck.” Gerard sighed. “Baby that feels fucking awesome.”
“Really good.” Gerard’s toes curled as Frank moved his fingers and he started to push his hips down to get them to go deeper. He felt like there was something they were supposed to touch, but he couldn’t find it.
Frank took a few more minutes and finished prepping him, taking his time to make sure it really felt good before he slicked up his cock and laid on top of Gerard. “Are you comfortable?” He asked softly, his hips right between Gerard’s thighs with the head of his cock pressing on his entrance.
Gerard wrapped his arms around Frank’s neck and nodded excitedly, pressing a kiss to his chin. He could feel the blunt pressure of Frank’s length and it was teasing him bad enough to make his cock leak. “I’m ready.” Frank’s body was warm against his and he was pretty sure he was going to explode if Frank didn’t start fucking him. “Do it.”
“Okay, just tell me if it hurts.” Frank kissed him on the lips again and held him there for a moment before he slowly started to push his hips forward, gasping at the tightness. “Holy shit you’re really a fucking virgin at this.”
Gerard whimpered underneath him and hooked his legs over Frank’s hips. “Deeper.”
Frank slid all the way in and kept still, letting Gerard’s hips adjust to it. “Feel good?”
“Yeah.” Gerard giggled, looking at Frank with pink cheeks and big bright eyes. “It doesn’t hurt. You can move.” He felt Frank pull out slightly and bit down hard on his lip when he went back in, feeling a little spark of electricity run up his spine.
“You like that?” Frank grinned, starting to slowly move himself in and out, fucking Gerard gently to let him adjust and to give himself some time to build.
“That feels amazing.” He whimpered. It was like Frank was everywhere. He felt him inside of him and on top of him, all around him. It was incredible and it was the most intimate they’d ever been. “Frankiiee.” Gerard whined. “Baby you feel really good.” Everything was warm. Frank’s cock, his lips, his tattooed arms that were holding Gerard so close, and his chest that rested against his as they started to move against each other in perfect sync.
“Do you know where your spot is?”
“My what?” Gerard said in a breathy voice, still pushing himself down to meet with Frank.
“You know, your prostate.” Frank grunted as he slowed his thrusts a bit.
“Your prostate, Gee.”
“What are you talking about? That’s like… somewhere else. People get cancer there.”
“Wait.” Frank stopped moving and raised his eyebrows at Gerard. “Do you not know what your prostate is?”
“I…” Gerard’s face fell and he started to look scared and nervous again, his body still buzzing from the pleasure as he spoke. “Should I?”
Gerard’s heart leapt to his throat and he started rapidly searching his mind. What the fuck was that thing? He knew it was, like, an organ or something but he had no clue what it had to do with fucking. “I-I don’t know.” He gulped. “Is that bad?”
“Baby, it’s… it’s you know, it’s like your g-spot. It’s right up here.” Frank murmured as he poked at Gerard’s navel. “Didn’t you learn that in school and shit?”
“I-I went to catholic school.”
“Oh shit that’s right.”
“Oh my God, you must think I’m the biggest idiot in the world.” Gerard groaned, turning his head away from Frank. “I’m so fucking dumb.”
“Aw Baby, hey don’t say that.” Frank frowned, pressing his lips to Gerard’s neck to try and comfort him. “Hey, it’s okay. It’s fine that you don’t know. I was just surprised you know? Did I make you feel bad?”
Gerard shrugged his shoulders and gazed down. God, he was such a virgin… Why didn’t he know all this stuff? “Is… I-Is it like something you’re supposed to touch?”
“Yeah Baby, yeah.” Frank whispered, tucking Gerard’s hair behind his ear and kissing his cheek. “Here come on, we’ll find it together. It’ll feel really good when I touch it okay? You’ll know when I hit it.”
“Aw come on, you were all happy.” Frank pouted. “Come back to me. You’re doing great.”
“Yeah.” Frank chuckled, starting to rock his hips back and forth again to get things going. “You feel amazing.”
Gerard’s cheeks turned a little pink and he put his hands on Frank’s shoulders to help push back against him. “You’re sweet…”
Frank reached between their bodies to get a firm grasp on Gerard’s cock and started stroking it slowly as he began speeding up his hips, going in deep to try and find Gerard’s special little spot that would make the experience a thousand times better for him. “Do you feel anything? Like there should be a little something that’s super sensitive in there.”
“I-I think so.” Gerard nodded, too caught up in the feeling to focus too much on talking. “Try hitting up a little.”
“Okay.” Frank breathed, backing out a bit before jerking his hips back in at a little bit more of an upward angle.
“AH!” Gerard cried out, clamping a hand over his mouth as soon as the noise escaped. “Holy shit.”
“Was that it?” Frank laughed as his heart started to speed up. Now it could get good.
Gerard babbled something incoherent and just started pushing back against him some more, making sure he hit it again and again. “Ohh God fuuuccckkk.” He moaned, throwing his head back. “Faster.”
“God you’re really fucking tight.” Frank huffed, putting his elbows on the mattress for support so he could start fucking Gerard properly.
Gerard had never felt this good during sex before. It was a whole new level, almost like he was floating. Every time Frank hit that spot, his whole body tingle and a wave of pleasure just washed over him from head to toe. “Baby are you gonna cum soon?” He gasped. “I’m not gonna last.”
Frank moaned something Gerard couldn’t fully understand and bent down to suck on Gerard’s neck, nibbling and biting the skin all while moving his hips in time with it. He’d let go of Gerard’s cock for the time being, but only to keep him from cumming so soon. “Oh God Baby I fucking love you. You’re so tight.”
Gerard’s cock was drawing wet little circles on Frank’s stomach and he could feel his orgasm building with every thrust of Frank’s inked hips. “Frankie I’m gonna cum.” He panted. “I can’t hold out, i-it feels too good. I’m gonna cum.”
“Me too.” Frank croaked, cursing as he pushed in faster and deeper. “God I love fucking you. Cum for me, Baby.”
Gerard shoved himself down a couple times and after less than thirty seconds of repeating the action, he came harder than he’d ever had in his life, ejaculating onto Frank’s stomach as his whole body tensed and shook for almost a full thirty seconds which was enough to make Frank cum as well. They both moaned together and held onto each other as they rode out their orgasms until their bodies went limp and Frank pulled out. “That was incredible.” He sighed, grinning as Frank went to the bathroom to clean up and throw the condom out. “I’m so glad we did that.”
“I knew you’d love it.” Frank smiled when he crawled back into bed with Gerard and turned off the lights, pulling the comforter up to their shoulders. “You wanna be held?”
Gerard’s face flushed, but he nodded, moving into Frank’s arms so they could snuggle together. It was weird. He was normally the dominant one. He made the first moves, he grabbed Frank on stage. But when they were alone together, he just changed. He melted. Frank just had that effect on him. “Frank?”
“I love you.” He whispered as he nuzzled his cheek against Frank’s chest. “More than anything…”
“I love you too, Gee.” Frank murmured, pressing his lips to Gerard’s forehead. “We have to get up early tomorrow, so get some sleep okay? You know you get cranky when you don’t get eight hours.”
“Okay.” Gerard giggled. “Goodnight.”
“Goodnight.” Frank chuckled in response. “Sweet dreams, Baby.”
When they woke up the next morning, Gerard had never been in a better mood. He kissed Frank about a thousand times, they got dressed together, grabbed some breakfast and then headed out into the cold air to wait for the tour bus.
“You have to keep me warm.” Gerard giggled as he pressed another kiss to Frank’s cheek. “I suck with cold weather.”
“You’re such a nerd.” Frank sighed, lacing his fingers through Gerard’s to keep his hands warm. “It’s cute.”
“I’m just so happy from last night. I’ve never felt that good before.” Gerard nuzzled their noses together. “I feel so close to you.”
“Hey guys!” Mikey’s voice called from behind them, making Gerard turn around and beam at him. God, he was in a good fucking mood. Ray was following behind them and Gerard actually felt a little giddy that they had no idea what an amazing night they’d had. That it was all between just him and Frank.
“Hey.” Gerard beamed when they walked up to them, leaning his head on Frank’s just because he could and because he liked to remind him how short he was. “You guys sleep okay?”
“Well uh…” Ray turned to Mikey and laughed.
“You guys umm…” Mikey crinkled his nose and nudged Ray in the side. “Kind of kept us up.”
“What do you mean?” Gerard asked, his face falling. Please no. They couldn’t have heard everything they’d said to each other last night.
“You losing your ass-ginity.” Ray snorted, prompting Mikey to groan and making Gerard’s heart drop to his stomach. “Gerard Man I had no fucking idea how long you held out. I’m sort of impressed.”
“You guys heard us last night?”
“Well yeah, we’re right next door.”
“A-All of it?” Gerard squeaked.
“And you didn’t say anything?! Th-That was private. I-It was just between us, i-it… Frankie you promised me they wouldn’t be able to hear!” Gerard exclaimed, turning and looking at Frank with big hurt eyes. “You said it was completely private. Do you know how much it took for me to give that to you last night? I asked you and you promised.”
“Gee, I-I had no idea.” Frank stuttered. “I didn’t know anyone could hear.”
“Oh my God.” Gerard croaked, covering his face in his hands. “Fuck you guys. That was a big fucking deal for me last night and it was supposed to be private.” He let go of Frank’s hand and walked back towards the hotel, crossing his arms and trying to swallow the lump in his throat as he left them. How could they fucking do that? They eavesdropped on one of the most intimate moments of his relationship with Frank? He heard Frank calling his name as he walked away, but he just ignored it. This was just fucking perfect. It wasn’t fair. Him and Frank never got any time alone and now they couldn’t even find privacy in a hotel room? Oh God what if they both heard him asking where his fucking prostate was?”
“Baby, hey stop.” Frank huffed from behind him, grabbing his arm and pulling him back. “Don’t be like that.”
“Frankie they heard us.” Gerard choked. “Th-They heard how scared and stupid I was and they fucking took away what I thought was the best night we’d ever spent together.” He blinked his eyes rapidly and stared down at the concrete, starting to shiver a bit from the freezing wind blowing against them. “And I asked you if they could hear us and told me they passed out.”
“I thought they did, Gee. Please don’t be mad at me.” Frank murmured, reaching up to cup Gerard’s face. “Come on, please? We had such an amazing night. Who cares if they heard us? We didn’t know that and it was still special.”
“But now it’s not just between us anymore…”
“Well yeah but it was still important. You opened up to me last night. Don’t take that back.” Frank titled Gerard’s chin up and pressed their lips together in a soft kiss despite the stares they were getting from other people. “Look just ignore them. We can squeeze into my bunk like we always do and watch fucking Netflix until we get to the venue tonight.”
Frank took his hand and gave it a comforting little squeeze, threading his fingers through Gerard’s before kissing his cheek and pulling him back towards the curb. “Are you mad at me?”
Gerard shook his head.
“Okay.” Frank led him back to the curb and kept a protective arm around him, shooting the rest of the band a couple death glares to keep them from saying anything until the bus came and Frank took him back to his bunk. “Come on.” He whispered as they crawled in together. There was just enough room in there for them to sit up or lie down together so Gerard kicked off his shoes and snuggled under the bed sheet with Frank. “Better?” Frank asked as he pulled Netflix up on his iPad and hooked an arm around Gerard’s shoulders, making sure the curtain on the bunk was closed.
“Yeah.” Gerard nodded shyly, taking solace in the distant sound of video games from their tour bus’s makeshift living room that meant Ray and Mikey wouldn’t be able to hear them. “Do you um… Do you think they heard everything last night? Or just part of it?”
“I don’t think they would have listened the whole time. That’s creepy, I’m sure they just heard the moaning and stuff you know?”
“Yeah, I guess… Still though.”
“I’m sorry that happened Baby.” Frank sighed, giving Gerard a little kiss on the forehead. “I know how important it was to you, but it still matters a lot that it happened. Even if Ray and Mikey might have heard a little bit.”
“Do you still want to do it again?” Gerard smiled, tracing circles on Frank’s thigh. “Because um… it felt really good. I think I want to ride you next time.”
“Yeah.” Gerard nodded, resting his head on Frank’s shoulder. “Maybe in the dressing room before the show tonight?”
“Sure Baby.” Frank gave Gerard a little squeeze and a kiss on the cheek, nuzzling his nose affectionately against the spot. “I’d love to.”
“Mm, you make me feel all safe and cozy.” Gerard sighed. “Never tell the guys I talk like that.”
“Don’t worry, you’re safe with me.” Frank teased, giving him a little poke in the ribs before resting his iPad against the wall where they could watch it and putting his arms around Gerard, kissing him on the neck just because he felt affectionate. “You mind if I go back to sleep for a little while?”
“I don’t mind.” Gerard shrugged, relishing in the feel of Frank’s tattooed arms holding him. He’d probably die if people knew how soft he got around Frank, but damn if it didn’t feel good. “Hey Frankie?”
“I love you.”
“I love you too, Gee.” Frank murmured, kissing him on the corner of his mouth. “We can have sex before the show, okay? We’ll find some alone time.”
“Okay.” Gerard blushed as he started to grin to himself. “Sleep tight, Frankie.”